Bossier

Bossier

glossier

Glossier have finally made their already iconic portfolio of products available in the UK, leaving women clamouring to get their hands on a range of products, from Boy Brow to Milky Jelly Cleanser. Not that they’ll have too much to choose from, the line is noticeably streamlined, limited to a few products, often with light textures and double-duty uses.

It is in stark contrast with other cult products that have dominated 2017; eyeshadow pallets the size of an Apple Mac, or contouring lipsticks with Neapolitan wedges of colour which claim to create an intricate ombre effect on the lips. With trends like this, the time women spent hunched over a mirror in the morning appeared to be growing exponentially.

So it’s not that surprising that author  Zadie Smith declared that when she caught her young daughter involved in another laborious make-up routine she’d probably found on Youtube, she told her she was ‘wasting time’.  That didn’t stop women across the world taking a sharp intake of breath.

Women no doubt have a complex relationship with make-up. On the one hand, elaborate, exhaustive make-up application now rivals Photoshop in its pursuit of unattainable female perfection. On the other, a daring approach to make-up, one that breaks the rules and places creativity front and centre, can feel like an act of liberation. But make-up, whatever its political identity, takes time.

I’m reminded of a mantra, which I found on the side of a novelty mug (this is where I find most of my best mantras).

 

 ‘You have as many hours in the day as Beyoncé’.

 

Whilst this might be accurate, unless Beyoncé has developed a way of stopping time – and if anyone has, it would be Beyoncé – it’s sometimes helpful to remind ourselves that Beyoncé has a lot of help. This includes the luxury of having someone else apply her make-up. And that leaves her free to, let’s say, check her emails, update her Instagram, or, I don’t know, release a Grammy Award winning album.

The simple fact is, there are twenty four hours in your day, if you use one of them to apply make-up you must, in so doing, forfeit something else. Do you think that Bob, who sits in the cubicle beside you, spends his morning applying winged eyeliner? No, he doesn’t. He might spend those spare fifteen minutes watching penguin clips on youtube, but he also might spend them replying to emails, practicing his upcoming presentation or sucking up to your boss.

That’s fifteen minutes a day. A hundred and five minutes a week. Ninety hours a year.

Now, ask yourself again how much you value that winged eyeliner.

Of course, that’s not to say make-up doesn’t have its place. If it helps you speak a little louder in Wednesday’s board meeting, by all means slap it on. But the fact remains, amongst time-poor women of today, creativity, self-expression and those looks you get from rude coworkers when you forget to put mascara on, still have to compete with utility.

That’s something Glossier’s founder, Emily Weiss, seems to know all too well. At 32, she’s running one of the hottest beauty start-ups in the world. She swears by her own cloud paint, which you can quickly pat onto the cheeks with your fingers for an instant rosy glow, leaving her with ample time to dominate the beauty market.

In fact, it’s no coincidence that most of the Glossier range can be applied with the hands, nor are the sheer textures unintentional. For MUAs and mavericks alike, the Glossier face can be completed, with little effort, in minutes. A swipe of this, a smear of that and you’re out the door and power-walking it to the tube station. It is the working woman’s make-up.

Behind candy-floss colourways and birthday cake scented lip balms, the Glossier girl is fuss-free, practical and she means business. It might not look it, but this is power dressing for the face.

 

A Thirst For Knowledge

A Thirst For Knowledge

Discovering The Difference Between Dry and Dehydrated Skin 

Yet again I’ve woken up, looked in the mirror and found red, flakey, uneven skin glaring back at me.

In the A to Z of skin complaints the beauty industry seems to threaten us with, my skin falls somewhere in the D’s. For dry. Or is that dehydrated? It might even be dull? About now, the only D that comes to mind is dizzy. Because my head is just about spinning.

Well, whatever it is it can’t be good. No one wants a ‘D’.

A ‘C’ is hardly ideal.

A ‘B’ might just be passable.

But if I had it my way I’d get a big old ‘A’, with a smiley face sticker thrown in for good measure.

Time for some homework.

The words, ‘dehydrated’ and ‘dry’ might sound like the same thing to any beauty layman or laydy. To make matters worse, they’re often used interchangeably. But their symptoms are very different. And, even more importantly, they require very different treatments.

Dry Skin

Dry skin is lacking OIL.

In normal circumstances skin creates its own oils, secreting sebum through sebaceous glands in the skin. This sebum nourishes the skin and prevents premature ageing as well. But if your skin isn’t producing enough of this sebum the skin will appear flakey, red, rough and irritated, could this explain my skin woes?

Armed with my diagnosis I went in search of a solution. This is where oils come in. Begin with a cleanser which is gentle on the skin and not too stripping, the best way to test this out is by finishing up your cleansing process with a few facial stretches, move your jaw around a little, furrow your eyebrows. Does the skin feel tight and uncomfortable? Then it’s too harsh swap it for one which does not include benzoyl peroxide, physical exfoliators or  alcohol too high up the list of ingredients.

As soon as you’ve finished cleansing you’ll need to follow up with facial moisturiser rich in oils. Contrary to what you might think, letting skin ‘breath’ is one of the worst things you can do for dry skin, instead apply moisturiser less than a minute after you’ve washed your face. Moisturisers with buttery consistencies or even pure facial oils. Jojoba oil works well as a base when it comes to moisturisers for dry skin as studies have shown that it closely mimics skin’s natural sebum. Gold star!

So, what is dehydrated skin?

Dehydrated skin lacks WATER.

Dehydrated skin is tight, shows fine lines and wrinkles and appears dull. Oh! So that’s where the dull comes in.

Anyone with a GCSE in biology knows that the human body is a bit like a bargain bin body lotion; that is, it’s mostly water. Problem is, the skin is the last organ in the body to absorb water and most of the problems lie, not in the amount of water present in the body, but how well our skin can retain it. So, the next time some pretty little thing on the cover of vogue tells you her trick to flawless skin is, ‘nothing more than drinking lots of water’, you can tell her to stick her Evian up her sebaceous gland.

The key here is to follow your moisturiser with a protective layer that locks in water. The best way to do this is with a serum containing barrier ingredients like hyaluronic acid and glycerin. This will make the skin more comfortable, and give the it a plumper, more radiant and youthful appearance.

And my skin? Well, its hard to tell under the impenetrable layer of moisturiser which I have been smearing on with a butter knife all day. I have swapped my cleanser with a one packed with shea butter and olive oil and have become a little more a lot more generous with my face moisturiser. My dry flaky patches seem to have been replaced with delicate pink shadows of new skin. This indicates that the old, unhealthy skin cells have been succeeded by brand new cells. So, my skin isn’t exactly making A grades any time soon, but it’s certainly in the running for ‘most improved’.

Here’s some of the best products for dry skin.

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And here are some products for the next time your skin feels dull, tight and dehydrated.

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Coming Through Your Speakers Loud and Squeaky

Coming Through Your Speakers Loud and Squeaky

Here’s a radio ad I wrote with my art director that went live for comparethemarket.com whilst I was at VCCP Blue. I hope you like it!

https://rhiandlaura.squarespace.com/live-work/

Luckily, when I began writing radio ads for this brand, I already had lots experience with their unique tone of voice, having handled their social media account across twitter and Facebook.

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Not-so-giant

Not-so-giant

I think a lot of people would rather not relive the pain of yesterdays defeat, if so, I would discourage you from reading on. For the rest of you, I’d like to begin with a small, inconspicuously placed, warning label: I am not a rugby expert, in fact I wouldn’t even describe myself as a rugby fan, so please, be gentle with me.

Well, if that was our metaphorical national anthem then here comes kick-off. It was dismal, worse than dismal, someone who knows infinitely more than me about the whole shebang described it as a ‘black night for England’s men in white’ ((good one Tom Fordyce) – no, I don’t know who that is either, but apparently he’s the chief BBC sports writer at Twickenham so for these purposes he’ll do).

And if you thought that was bad news for England, it’s devastating news for O2. In fact, O2 were so devastated that they managed only one, measly, tweeted response to the whole sordid affair.

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O2 began their campaign with a charming little TV ad, one which fans appeared to respond well to. A quick look at the O2 website reveals that engagement with customers was high across social media.

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But team sponsorship advertising inevitably involves a gamble, and O2 didn’t pick the winning horse. O2 desperately need a plan b, or they risk wasting a lot of the long-term brand visibility drummed up by the campaign.

Which brings me to conversion, converting the energy and excitement surrounding the campaign into something which remains positive and valuable. Fan’s responses to defeat are often fickle, the crowds of England fans swarming out of the stadium ten minutes before the end of the match last night is proof of this. But if O2 could promote proud, unshakeable loyalty to the team, even in their darkest hour, perhaps with the phrase ‘always giants’ or by encouraging fans to ‘wear their rose’ unashamedly on Monday morning in solidarity, could they too, foster a sense of brand loyalty which is becoming increasingly rare amongst modern consumers? We’ll just have to wait and see.

Pinteresting

Pinteresting

 

Social Media Week took place in London last week and during that time Pinterest gave a talk called, Anti-Social: Why Pinterest is all about personal experience, offering some insight into why Pinterest is an entirely different animal to the managerie of other social medias engaging with consumers.

Back in the 18th century, long before don’t tell the bride, ‘strobing’ and endless youtube tutorials, girls got their kicks from gluing bits of paper onto crap they found around the house. It was called ‘decoupage’ and it was The Shit. Perhaps without realising, women were collating and categorising their interests into something rewarding and tangible.

Two-hundred years later. Two dimensional floral arrangements and be-ribboned kittens have been replaced by blow-drying tips and ‘overnight oats’ recipes. Enter Pinterest. Pinterest replicates behaviours that humans have been acting out since time immemorial. This time it’s just a little more public. Which it’s easy to equate it to other social platforms.

But this is a social networking concept which provides unique insight into consumer behaviour. Why? Because it’s not a social network. Pinterest describe themselves as a ‘thought catalog’. Pinners, unlike facebookers, or ‘grammers, do not use a public filter. Instead, we are left with an intimate view of our subject. One which can inform us on how consumers plan – plan is a key word when it comes to Pinterest, with halloween searches trending in July.

Pinners forgo the immediacy that seems to dominate the age we live in, instead often choosing to plan important life events, weeks, months and even years in advance. Pinterest can predict trends much earlier than if we were to simply look at sales data. Pinterest is a form used by planners, by people undergoing a considerable life change and by people who make considered decisions when buying, making it a treasure trove of consumer insight which does not just offer foresight. It also offers authenticity.

Orchard Beach

Orchard Beach

A short story, as featured in, Undergrowth: UEA Undergraduate Creative Writing. 

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Pink Suit Orchard 1

Orchard Beach: A Series of Portraits

It is almost imperceptible, beginning when the spring rots into summer and the plump fruit that lined the boughs now sits at the roots, fermenting into a sweet spicy liquor that sends the seagulls looping though the air. The people of The Bronx leave the dirty heat of New York for Orchard Beach.

*

Sweating bodies pile into subway carriages. Mom ushers them in, shamelessly yelling instructions, in a way only Mothers can. She sits herself down with her youngest on her lap, her oldest sitting beside her and Maria before her. The train pulls away from the station and she hooks her finger into Maria’s belt loop to steady her. The little girl holds a rolled up towel purposefully under her arm. From the other arm hangs a plastic grocery bag. Inside, white-bread sandwiches, home-made sunscreen, iodine and baby oil and brightly coloured juice boxes upon which hosts of smiling animals congregate. Maria likes animals. Every so often she swings her head, making her little pink hair bobbles clatter together.

*

Jamaica, where barefoot boys with soft muscles and hard feet skirt the tide, chewing on sugar cane, or holler to sailors for odd jobs far beyond their physical capability which they stoically attempt a few times before collapsing on the ground in fits of giggles. The tide swells against the shore like it has since the beginning of time and tall limber palm trees submit to the breeze, curving their spines languorously. Only the disorder of man could interrupt the soft inhalation-exhalation of the land.

The war came in 1939 and the men left, chasing stolen pictures, in flickering black and white, of boyhood adventure and 1886 Rifles. Gone with the tide, and with them, the music. Back then, the bands that played at weddings, baptisms and other town gatherings would consist of a gaggle of men somewhere between sixteen and thirty years old . They packed up that music in bags and suitcases, tucked it into pockets. The stillness came and the soft muscled, hard footed boy was left sat slumped on the sand, the sugar cane hanging limply out of his mouth.

*

He stands outside the apartment building throwing bits of gravel at the window, Paulo’s cheesy like that, Tiffany thought to herself. She leans her head out, her hair falling forward and yelled down ‘shut up you asshole, you’ll wake my mom!’, but she’s giggling. They break into a run down the sidewalk, in case they miss them, her always running a little ahead and looking back to laugh. ‘Eh! Eh! We’re here’. They clamber into the convertible, shined up last night, two in the front, three in the back. Her perched on Paulo’s lap. hiked up skirts, naked thighs, paper-bagged glass bottles, and him, thanking God for every bump and swerve in the road, and her, with a devilish look in her eye that he wouldn’t know until he was a little older.                                                          

*

And so, that soft muscled, hard footed boy grew a little older and found a girl who felt like home. He borrowed a suit and bought a pair of scarlet coloured suede shoes and her mother altered her wedding dress, a little shorter, a little fuller, and they were married in a chapel by the sea. And when they had left, the birds ate the rice and all was as it was and ever had been again and days became weeks became months.

*

The morning rises and spins into noon and the children return to where their families congregate beneath umbrellas for melted chocolate bars and potato chips. Only a few young stragglers are left, darting and skipping along the shore, dodging her as she walks slowly up and down the beach. None of the children know Lady and yet each and every one of them unconsciously but unquestionably treats her with an inexplicable deference.  Her black bikini is laced with brown leather cord, her parasol is of a matching brown and rests upon her shoulder like a halo. Among the jewelled trash and candy-coloured bikes she is the cool wet earth beneath the shadow of the tree. Her Mother, sitting further up on a plastic garden chair, turns to her sisters and says ‘Oh isn’t Lady a funny one’ but children just have a way of knowing.  

*

That was until he came home one night with fizzing, wild eyes. She finally slammed her hand down on the kitchen table. ‘What! What then! Out with it!’. And he did, like a guilt-ridden and apologetic young child he spilled out his dreams. And she was raised up right wasn’t she, and she’d taken those vows hadn’t she? Till death do us part. So she followed him, just like those young men before them, out with the tide.

*

As the sun edges further towards the horizon, the Taylor children begin to tire, one by one abandoning sand-castles, or sand-igloos or other indistinguishable sand-constructions. Until each one sits cross legged in the semi-circle around Gramma in patient anticipation. Even the youngest know there’s no use in rushing her. A few minutes pass until she cracks open one almond kernel eyelid. ‘Now, you all know that ‘fore I had your Momma I lived down in Atlantic city’, she begins slowly, ‘now down there they got a beach, lot like this one, whites fist ones to call it  Chicken Bone Beach in the beginning I think, anyway, soons everyone was callin’ it that an’ no one could remember what its real name was to begin with, well they called it that cos sure enough, whole beach lined with chicken bones, height o’ summer it was pretty dangerous, kids running round with no shoes on, getting themselves cut up, place half swarming with gulls, fighting for scraps. Now these white folk would walk on past the beach shaking their heads, used to say it was cos negro folk so dirty, leavin’ they trash about like that, they’s animals, they’d say, and it’d sure seem that way, huh, but you ever go to a white folk beach and you might notice  something’ and she opened her mouth just a little and gave a soft cackle, ‘sees white folks’ beaches had men that’d turn up in the evenin’ and pick up all the litter’, ‘here, it’d never occurred to us that those white folk had been spreadin just as much trash about, they just had people to clean up after ‘em!’.

*

She made a home for them, out the grime and the darkness of Harlem, but the children stood outside, kicking cans and looking perpetually lost.

And then Moses came, and led us all out of Egypt, to the Promised Land.

His name was Robert Moses, a perpetually suited man with sloping eyebrows. In 1947 he slammed his pen down on a city map and the towering grey waves were parted. Whole neighbourhoods were torn aside, replaced by one mile of silver beachfront, made, not by the will of God, but the hand of man.

*

Kevin dug his fingers into the wet sand and looked up at his big brother sitting beside him, a little straighter, a little higher. It had always been this way, in every memory Selassie had towered over him, even after Kevin had started to catch up. Selassie and before that King and before that Jonathan. Selassie had always recognised the malleability of a name, something one could shed like skin. Skin. A quivering flag in green, yellow and red and the profile of Lion upon it. The Letters K and G in unsteady gothic lettering which the brothers shared. Two teardrops, one filled, one unfilled. And Kevin, R.I.P 1994 – 2009 inked onto his skin. Selassie sat alone on the sand and looked out before him. His eyes fell upon some indistinguishable piece of humanity, glittering and red, discarded at the mouth of the ocean, swallowed by the froth and carried out with the tide. 

*

The Puerto Rican woman next door first told her about it. That Sunday, after church, she had prepared their lunch, packed their towels and they’d travelled out to Orchard Beach. Humans, drawn to the water by some growling prehistoric desire and a more conscious longing that painted the inside of their eyelids in shining aquamarine blue. And so, the people of The Bronx had carved out their own migratory pattern. Not some colonial quest set out upon by men clasping weapons and hunting for gleaming things trapped in rocks, men with money in their eyes and blood on their hands. No, they came like children, led by their soul. Noah picked up each of his children, one on either shoulder and walked out, into the tide, and his wife followed.

One Size Does Not Fit All: Product Description and Branding

One Size Does Not Fit All: Product Description and Branding

Product Descriptions. I love them. Almost as much as I love Apple Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum. Okay, maybe not that much. But I view them with a relish that might come as a bit of a surprise to the majority of normal human beings. During a week at OgilvyOne I spent one particularly joyous day pouring over a number Louis Vuitton handbag descriptions.

Pink Suit Prod Des 1

‘Enhance any day or evening event with the feminine Chain Louise. It combines sleek calfskin leather with a beautiful gold chain and opening clasp to make a truly elegant clutch.’ What’s not to love, it’s luxuriously descriptive whist remaining appropriately pithy. I even got given the opportunity to give it a go myself.

Pink Suit Prod Des 3

‘In luminous, jewel colours, the Rochette Limelight radiates femininity, in a new, evening size. With its light, supple design and stain resistant coating it can be easily stored in a handbag during the day.’

The product description draws from Louis Vuitton’s word bank with an attention for detail one would expect from a fashion house which sells some of the most coveted handbags in the world. But would you expect it from say, Monki, a smaller sister brand of H&M.

Pink Suit Prod Des 4

‘This dress is a true Monki talisman… Oversized and midi-length with raw, frayed edges and a cheeky little rip. It pulls over your head for an instant boss look, it has pockets and it is seriously rad for so many reasons.’

With their own monthly magazine, which includes interviews, illustrations and band tip offs among other things, Monki is already a highly thoughtful creative force. Which is why it comes as no surprise that this fresh new brand have handled even their product description with the same enchanting flare that runs through the entire store, both online and on the shop floor.

It’s exciting to see it increasingly being used not just by premium brands, but by high street sellers, in such an interesting way. Product description like this, plays it’s part in creating a brand harmony which runs though every thread of a company. But more importantly, with just a little bit of copywriting magic, it garners interest in a product. And, as Mark Shaw explains in Copywriting, it’s much easier to make a customer want to buy themselves a ‘Mega Denim Dress’ than it is to sell it to them.